The Treasure Within

Remaining authentic

I had a dream the other night. I was traveling and lost both my passport and my flight ticket and the bag they were in. I went on a search to find them, thinking that someone had stolen the bag from me. I woke up, then found myself back in the dream, still looking, still searching.

A dream like that stays with me. I’ve always said that if I don’t have a valid passport or ticket in hand, I’ll feel wary. Those two things allow me to believe that I have an “out” back to the former life I led in Belgium. And even though I’m mostly well adjusted, here, in my small midwestern town, there’s an endless pull back to that other place where I left a huge hunk of my heart. Often, before I’ve even taken a planned trip back, I already have tickets in hand (or at least on the computer) for the next one.

A dream like that can mean many things. And I could probably find a myriad of explanations for it. But I’ll stick to the one that makes sense to me: how do I continue to live out my life in an authentic manner, one that makes sense of where I came from, where I am now and who I want to continue to become no matter the circumstances?

From the big chateau where I was born in Belgium through the years of French school and Belgian best friends, to the years of solitude and adjustment to a new culture here in the States. From the years of hard work, penny pinching and parenting to the current days of more flexible living. What I’ve discovered is that within me, there is a center that never changes. It’s a mixture of intuition, life experience and observation that serves me well.

To listen to it, I have to remember to let go of other voices that might cloud it, other pressures that might squeeze it out, other circumstances that might force it to change.

No matter what gets thrown my way, it’s my voice and my heart that matters. And I return to it daily. I imagine it a little like my own inner house, with its own set of decorations, its own language, its own beauty. That solid nugget at my core keeps me afloat through whatever rough seas I travel. As a new week begins full of the unexpected and unknown, it’s the treasure that I carry within.